What Would You Have Done?

So here's what went on here this morning at my house. I woke up this morning and made sure A1 got off to school OK. He'd been having trouble for the past couple of weeks waking up and missed the bus on four (4) occasions. He likes to sneak and read or listen to his iPod until super late and hits the snooze button three too many times. Since he technically isn't suppose to ride in the government car, I had to drag myself out of bed and take him to school. I wasn't too thrilled with this since it's a pain in the ass to take him. Anyway. He was out the door this morning with no problems. Way to go A1!! (Plus he didn't want to have to pay me $5 for a ride to school. Yep, I told him I'm going to start charging since he lets free transportation go by the house without being on it. He's a tightwad and that put some pep in his step!!)

A2 woke up screaming bloody murder at around 1 in the morning so I schlepped into his room and got him and planted him in bed beside me. Since hubby wasn't home last night I made a pillow barricade and we slept just fine. He woke up this morning in a great mood. He was crawling all over me and trying to tickle me up under my chin. That usually feels more like having my skin removed with sandpaper more than it tickles but I endure it. He plays pretty rough these days!

Once he caught site of the remote control on the night stand the tickling was over. **Thank the Lord!** He needed his Spongebob fix so I turned on the television. We had to settle for the Backyardigans. I went to the pantry and got the Crunch Berries out and brought them to bed for him to munch on. Don't tell my husband that though, he'll freak out that I let the baby eat in bed.....on his side no less. While he was munching, I called the preschool lady and got him set up for that. It doesn't start until September 5th so I can live with that. I have from now until then to prepare both him and myself for the big event.

That means we have to teach him to play easier and to get into a "normal" sleeping pattern. That's going to hurt me a lot more than it does him. A2 and I are such night owls. He was like that in my belly. He'd start his nightly kick fest like clockwork at around 1 in the morning.

Anyway, she said with the two year olds they just play at different play stations, do some crafts, paint and just other general play. There isn't much structure you can plan with two year olds. They practice taking turns and playing with other kids. I'm going to give it a shot. It's on Monday's and Wednesday's and it's from 9:30 til 12. It would give me time to clean my house without him being right up under me or to do some shopping without having to take him in and out of the car seat. Although, that has never been a problem. He loves to shop or to just go "bye, bye" in general. I'll actually miss him if I go shopping without him.

After I talked to her I called the doctor's office. I'm seriously (they already have it at the office) considering getting the Mirena IUD inserted. I just have to get up the nerve to go and have it done. I have a standing appointment for in the morning but hubby said we should talk about it more tonight when he gets home.

I finished my phone calls and flopped back on the bed for A2 to feed me some Crunch Berries. We ate some and watched some television together for about an hour. I needed a shower so we got off the bed and headed for the bathroom. I turned on the water and remembered that while I was in there yesterday I had to glom together two itty bitty pieces of soap to even get a lather.

I'm apparently the ONLY one who knows where the extra soap is kept. So I went to the cabinet got out a bar for me and one for hubby. I took mine out of the box, put it on the counter and turned to take the other one out of the box and pitch the boxes in the trash. A2 picked up MY bar of soap and started to turn and run with it.

Me: "NO NO NO, Don't take my soap!"

A2: "Gabba, dabba, kitty cat"

I tried to grab him as he headed out the door but he turned back into the bathroom, ran past the shower and PLUNK......threw it into the toilet.

Me: "AWWWW MAAAAN!!"

A2: "Byyyyeeee"

Damn. I had to reach my hand into the toilet to retrieve MY soap, all the while thinking to myself, why couldn't it have been HUBBY'S soap??!!

What was I to do? I considered throwing it away but why in the hell would I do that? It's not like there was anything in the toilet and if you know me, you know I'm very anal (no pun intended) about keeping my toilets clean. Besides don't you just rub the soap up the crack of your ass and over your dirty funky feet anyway? What could be dirtier than that?

I jumped in the shower with my soap. I made sure to wash it between my hands for several minutes before I commenced my shower. I'm sure it was perfectly fine but as I was lathering up, I couldn't help thinking I just as well could be rubbing a purple turd all over my body since my pretty soap had just come out of the toilet. I thought about using hubby's soap as back up but who has that much time? I was doing good to get a shower in the first place. I got out, dried off and put on an extra layer of lotion. I needed to at least smell good since I didn't quite feel clean!

Ahhhh, the joys of motherhood!